Ms. Longaker opened the session with an exercise. She asked
the audience to just sit quietly, and use the image of a shaken glass
of muddy water to represent the usual state of our mind, and to
imagine that by sitting quietly we could allow another aspect of mind,
the natural clarity, to emerge.

She asked that the audience members allow their minds to slowly settle
as they sat. She ended this opening exercise with the suggestion that
such an exercise allows a person to be a little more present. She
emphasized the importance of the quality of presence that caregivers
bring to their care
for the dying.

Ms. Longaker spoke of her entry into a spiritual path. She
spoke of the death of her husband 20 years ago of leukemia, and how
her experience with his death moved her toward an involvement with
issues related to end of life care. She spoke of her involvement in a
hospice program and her
introduction to Sogyal Rinpoche. She spoke of her continuing
involvement with Sogyal Rinpoche, Rigpa (Sogyal Rinpoche's network of
training centers), and the Spiritual Care Education and Training
Program, with which her role is Senior Educator.

Ms. Longaker spoke of putting into daily practice, from
whatever spiritual tradition a person follows, an experience that
supports the ability to more present in moments of caring for the
dying. Ms Longaker noted that such daily practices also provide care
for the caregiver, creating an
atmosphere of greater peace, and the ability to be more present.

Ms. Longaker spoke of personal qualities that contribute to
care for the dying. She noted genuineness, confidence, and presence.

In speaking about the quality of presence Ms. Longaker
addressed the dual aspect of presence. She spoke of our habitual way
of being outwardly active but internally absent. The counter to this
was seek internally, and act from, a deep clear awareness. She said
that recognizing the dying person as a whole person could enhance this
quality of deep presence. She spoke of seeing the dying person as more
than their suffering. She used the image of mist on a mirror to
describe a
patient's suffering. The suffering was not always there. The patient
has an essence: intact, whole, infinite, unborn and undying. She
described a point of view of death as a transition, that essence
continues past this transition. She addressed the possibility that
care can support the infinite part of person.

Ms Longaker spoke of genuineness from the point of view of
recognizing that there was not a huge difference between the caregiver
and dying person. She suggested that caregivers be open to letting
the dying give their final lessons about life. She used the image of
little boats on a river moving
toward a waterfall - the moment of death. She pointed out that no one
could be certain when that moment would come for him or her.

Ms Longaker referred to some ideas described in her book. She
spoke of four tasks of living and dying from her text. She described
death as a very active time of life. The four tasks she described as
follows: 1. understanding and transforming suffering; 2. making a
connection, healing
relationships, and letting go; 3. preparing spiritually for death;
and, 4. finding meaning in life. She indicated that her main focus in
her talk was to address the third task of spiritually preparing for
death and assisting patients in this task. She noted that in attending
to this task with clients causes us to look at our own death, our
fears and how we are applying ourselves to the task of living and
dying.

Points that Ms. Longaker made were often accompanied by a
story. She said that she used stories rather than overheads. Several
points that she made included quotations and references to Sogyal
Rinpohe's work. One quotation, she indicated, summed up a great deal
related to the spiritual practices around dying. She repeated several
times: "At the moment of death, there are two things that count:
Whatever we have done in our lives, and what state of mind we are in
at that
moment."

Ms Longaker made a significant point using details from
descriptions of Near Death Experiences (NDE's). She described the
sense of expansion, peace and joy that characterize many NDE's. She
described death as a great opportunity to recognize a connection to
the infinite. She
also offered the view that a risk is present that a person in death
may "smuggle across" all theirs fears, attachments, troubles, etc.,
which would make any after death experience a continuation of the
suffering present in the current life.

Ms Longaker spoke of a choice that individuals make in how
they live. She spoke of the many moments of transition in everyday
life in which a person may choose to continue the habits and suffering
that they experience in life. She noted the many "little deaths" that
we experience on the
way to the "big death" at the end of life. She spoke of the moment of
first waking in the morning, a time of presence and awareness, before
all the thoughts and concerns about life flood back in to awareness.

She spoke of the possibility that we habitually regenerate our
suffering every day, and
that there is a choice to do other than that through a daily spiritual practice.

Ms. Longaker shared a number of stories to elaborate her
points. She told a story about what she described as the practice of
the continuous prayer of the heart. A woman took on the practice in
her dying of saying, "Lord Jesus Christ have mercy on me." Ms.

Longaker described how this practice transformed the woman's process
of dying. She spoke of the importance of facilitating a dying
client's effort to find meaning in their life and death. She spoke of
the importance of
compassion. She told a story of concentration camp victims in W.W.II
dedicating their suffering to the wish for the well being of others
whom they loved.

Ms. Longaker referred to Elizabeth Kubler-Ross's work. She
spoke of a Reverend Mwalimu Imara and the notion of three commitments
for a meaningful life. She described the three
commitments as follows: To become aware of and accept ourselves; to
invest ourselves in authentic dialogue with others; and, to decide on
a positive direction of growth.

Ms. Longaker offered a description of a spiritual practice
from the Tibetan Buddhist tradition. She spoke of Phowa: Traditional
Phowa and Essential Phowa. She described the process of Essential
Phowa. The reader may be interested to know that this practice as
described is on pages 124-5 of Ms. Longaker's book.

Ms. Longaker's book is available through Main Street Books,
Doubleday, New York (on the web at http://www.bdd.com). The Spiritual
Care Education and Training Program is at 499 Powell Street, Suite
200, San Francisco, CA, 94102-95103 (also on the web at
http://www.atlantech.net/rigpa/spcarenw.htm). There is a link to an
interview with Ms. Longaker on
the Rigpa site at http://www.microtec.net/~inerson/ondeath/longaker.html.